Waiting for the undecided

tick tock. tick tock. tick tock.
that sound.
the wait.
the suspense.
the outcome.

greatest gift you can give.

we are all waiting for something...
the kettle to boil to make some tea after a stressful day of life.
your hot chips to to finish frying so you can enjoy their delectable goodness after craving.
the bus that's supposed to arrive so you won't be late for uni.

patience acts as a catalyst to achieve

 the endurance of waiting.

when i think of waiting,

i always cross reference it to patience.

patience is hard to measure,

but defined through their attitude.

at least i'd like to think so (:

HANG IN THERE. 

(even when it drives you insane)

And until then..

i'll be waiting,

because good things come 

to those who wait.

( optimism is hard )

katwinky.x.

Feeling of indifference

 I know I probably have been neglecting my blog for the longest time now, 
but that's probably cause I've been so preoccupied with a lot of things
whether it be uni, family, friends, relationships etc.

I guess I don't have that random urge of word vomiting anymore,
maybe due to the lack of inspiration or being more vocal about
anything and everything I notice. 

LIKE OH-EM-GEE PRINCE GEORGE WAS JUST BORN.

To be honest, I don't really know what's happening.
My mood has been quite negative lately.
My patience is practically depleted.
Easily irritated.
Feel the need to hermit up from the world.
Emotionally void.

To pinpoint these triggering source would be a hard find
cause I've been wondering for the past few weeks..
Hurts me more than you think you know.

I hate this feeling.
Not knowing where life is headed.
Feeling blamed for things out of my control.
Missing someone that's not there anymore.
Taken for granted.
BUT, that is life.

 I figured there are some things that give me temporary happiness
from my long day of nothing.

1) Getting the most randomest texts that make me smile.

I don't really receive text content like this
(but maybe I sometimes send stuff like this and spam people, SHUSH)
i love the feeling of someone having the 
urgency to tell you something and keeps you curious, 
then it makes you panic and realise it was nothing
really that urgent. 

2)  Enveloping yourself in your blanket in winter

 I literally look like I got wrapped up in a yummy dumpling
sealed completely shut and do not want to move in the risk
of exposure to external air coming to invade my warmth.

3. Someone willing to look like a fool to see you smile

HIDE YO KIDS. HIDE YO WIFE.

Normally I would be embarrassed,

but nowadays small gestures go a long way.

People that have the initiative to talk and plan to 

go out with you without you having to hint, love yous ~

4. Narrowing down a hobby to distract you

ideas so far..

 --> Another blog for DIY stuff and Budget Barbie type blog

(Spreading my asian tips and tricks to the world)

PRO: time consuming and getting them creative juices flowin'

CON: more prone to spend money

 

 --> Doing more cooking

PRO: i get to eat food, rather than instant noodles and frozen food.

CON: my mixer broke -.- no baking for a while

--> Photography

PRO: i have an alright digital camera

CON: have no idea where to start or where to take pictures

-->Recording songs

PRO: i get to improve my singing and technical skills

CON: can't sing or play instruments well

what do you guys reckon?

5. A really long hug that you never wanna let go of

 

Unexpected hugs make me so happy.

BUT, there's something about a kiss on the cheek (..makes me giddy)
It's sweet and gives me warm and fuzzy feelings..dang romcoms.
(i love chuck and blair, they're my favourite tv couple)

FOOD FOR THOUGHT..

Been watching a lot of grey's anatomy lately

katwinky.x.

It's a new me

It's a new year, (although it's february, delayed i know)

A year to start again, to leave regrets behind and 

work towards achieving more this year. 

To not only thinking about it, but going out and doing it.

Uncovering more about myself.

i wanna make changes in this year.

for once, i'm making a list of what i wanna achieve. 

cus' that way i can reflect back on it at the end of 

the year and feel all accomplished (: 

1.  unplanned, random and spontaneous. 

i've always wanted be more spontaneous
but maybe cause money or not having a car or lack of freedom
have gotten in the way for me to do that.
excuses to take the easy way out.

always wanted to do this,
wake up when it's still dark.
pack some breakfast, with a large
thermos of hot chocolate.
bring some blankets and pillows.
drive to the beach in my pjs.
watch the sunrise.
[ ^ once i can drive by myself (: ]

2. for the rainy days.

working harder to save up. 
my funds will go towards my future house 
ambitious, but eventually achievable (:

short term,
road trips.
travelling.
food adventures.

3. Love harder.

It's being able to compromise to make each other happy.
It's surprising them with treats.
It's those random messages asking how their day was.
It's to be slow to assume the worse.
It's to be able to share the good and bad times.
It's putting others before yourself.
It's the shoulder to lean on when times get rough.
It's giving without expecting anything in return.
It's the patience you give when they drive you crazy.
It's appreciating each moment with the ones you love.

we come to love

not by finding the perfect person,

but by learning to see an 

imperfect person perfectly.

4. keep it interesting.

i admit i'm not the best at baking,
but it's a past time that i enjoy 
because i've always taken an interest
in "artsy fartsy" stuff and i thought picking
up a hobby would make my days more productive.
goal to bake at least once a month :D

wanting to buy,
adriano zumbo cookbooks.
light blue kitchen aid mixer if
i end up sticking to this hobby.

cookies.redvelvetcupcakes.macarontower.

5. movie moments.

i've always wondered,
authors like nicholas sparks
(a walk to remember, the notebook, dear john)
are as romantic in real life as his
characters are portrayed in his books.

even though romcom movies are mostly cliche
and not likely to happen ever.
a lot of them are inspired by non-fictional characters.
opposed to fictional books about my adventures to willy wonka's factory..
sadly disappointed ):

it isn't necessarily to experience movie moments
because it's pretty hard to, but it's just implying to
just enjoy every moment as it comes.
take every opportunity and make the most of it!

quote of the day,

katwinky.x.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Surprises either have the following effects:

the i-am-totally-shocked-i-think-i-just-peed-a-little surprise.

the oh-you're-just-trolling-me-revenge-is-around-the-corner surprise

the i-feel-as-though-i've-been-electrocuted-cause-it-came-out-of-nowhere surprise

THEN CAME MY SURPRISED LOOK.

the this-is-a-weird-coincidence-they're-here-still-don't-get-it-till-ten-minutes-later surprise

my mind lags,
but i'm forever grateful
that i'm blessed with such great friends :)
irreplaceable and priceless.



katwinky.x.

relationship deficit doesn't have to be an option

who said you gotta enter deficit 
when in a relationship ? 
i think the best things in life come free
as cheesy as that sounds.

the ones i would do:

1. Maybe not trees, maybe go on a playground adventure(?)

4. i don't know how that works but it would be different haha

6. i've always wanted to do this ! Building a tent either outside/inside

my house with a picnic and candles and watching our favourite

movie on my laptop while lying down shoving our face with goodies.

8. HECK YES ! Spontaneous adventure, love love love.

11. actually doing tourist things are quite fun 

when you haven't done it in a while :)

12. that would be beyond cute! wishful thinking D: 

13. dress up as your alter ego, that would be interesting ..

17. ORRR a photolog of an invisible couple :D

18. i love walking, it's really refreshing and romantic -blushes-

20.ORRR watch a korean drama and do that -enter generic storyline-

Babe,
you're the best boyfriend.
you give me things that i don't deserve
and much much much more.
my expectations of you go far beyond
what i'd see a person doing.
you make me understand what it means
to experience a sacrificial love.


although there are times that
we may falter due to disagreements
but we remember the memories we
shared are all priceless and irreplaceable.


we may like our eggs served differently,
we may have different views on finishing food,
we may get ready at different paces,
BUT as everyone says opposites attract ;)

despite our similarities,

despite our differences,

you are my better half.

happy threes babe.
i miss you.
i love you.


BLERGH..

i miss those types of hugs

that you give me.

i miss how you curl up when you sleep

and look like the cutest baby, my baby <3

katwinky.x.

Whole New World

recently, i met up with my uncle from new zealand.

he's a steward and has travelled all over the world,

experienced a vast array of cultures, it's amazingly unfair D:

so it got me thinking of how much i'm missing out on and to 

make it an aim in life to visit places that i've always wanted to :)

1) ITALY

THE AUTHENTIC HAND-MADE PASTA AND PIZZA.

THE RIDE THROUGH THE CITY ON A VESPA IN THE SUNSET CULTURE.

THE WHEN-THE-MOON-HITS-YOUR-EYE SERENADING ON GONDOLAS.

2) JAPAN

THE SUSHI MAKING, TEPPANYAKI FLIPPING FOOD.

THE WEIRD INNOVATIVE TECHNOLOGY THAT YOU NEVER GET.

THE ANIME LIKE FEEL WALKING THROUGH CHERRY BLOSSOMS.

3) FRANCE

THE EIFFEL TOWER OUTSIDE YOUR WINDOW.

THE ACCENT THOUGHT TO BE ADAPTED FROM SEBASTIAN(LITTLE MERMAID).

THE CITY OF ROMANCE  ENVELOPING YOUR BEING.

4) USA

THE FAMILIAR SCENERY FROM YOUR FAVOURITE MOVIES.

THE UNUSUALLY BIG PORTIONS OF FOOD.

THE CHANCE TO BUMP INTO AN A-LISTER.

5) ENGLAND

THE BLOODY BRILLIANT ACCENTS.

THE SOLDIERS WITH THE BIG TALL HATS STANDING EVER SO STILL.

THE CHANCE TO EXPERIENCE A PROPOSAL FROM A REAL PRINCE.

it would be amazing if i could visit..

life philosophy : hakuna matata

AFRICA.

one day..

one day..

it will be achieved :)

katwinky.x.

Kickin' it random

do you ever get those days where you wanna
just do whatever you're thinking of?

then realise a few minutes/hours/days/years later

REGRET. 

Having your own rave in public hoping your friends

would join you and do the same.

And realise they bailed and people in public 

look at you and go..

When you think of an awesome spontaneous adventure

that will blow your socks off.

And you realise your parents don't give you consent

and you flash em one of these and they just cave.

Feeling super photogenic and photo bombing every picture

with your elusive charms.

But when you see the photos uploaded on facebook

it turns out a little something like this..

SLIGHTLY, reminds me of Newton's third law.

" For every action, there is an equal and opposite re-action."

BUT, then again..

KEEP IN MIND.

katwinky.x.

Doubtful,very doubtful

Throughout the human race, 
there is a mutual feeling that we experience.

PARANOIA.

It is manifested from some deeply-rooted fear
of genuinely feeling that you will get screwed over.
( to be blunt )


The sudden fluctuation of emotion after
someone asks you if you're okay

we hide

..from our fears

..from arguments

..from pain

..from confrontation

..from loss

etc.

To live in fear from your paranoia will leave
you with regrets in life.. don't let em hold you back :)

don't pre-judge a person,
as they are probably going through their
own problems in life far beyond your comprehension.

how to protect your heart.

SHOULD never expect
                          never demand
                          never assume
KNOW     your limits
                        where to stand
                        your role
DON'T     get affected
                       get jealous
                       get paranoid

Just go with the flow and stay happy.

The feeling of being understood

and trying to keep it together 
for their sake cause you love them

katwinky.x.

We could happen

" There are times,

when i just want to look at your face

with the stars in the night

There are times when i just want to 

feel your embrace in the cold night.

I just can't believe that you are mine now.

You were just a dream that I once knew,

I never thought i would be right for you.

I just cant compare you with anything in this world,

you're all i need to be with forevermore. "

- David Archuleta

My favourite quotes in romantic movies

The Vow

Hmm, i can't wait for the day that i get married and we exchange our vows (wishful thinking) i wish i could probably articulate to the person i'm willing to spend the rest of my life with the overwhelming feelings they give me every time i see them or spend time with them, that every moment we shared had strengthened me into what i've always wanted to be.And that they make me, me and accepted me for flaws and all and with all the baggage i come with.And to know that no matter what obstacles we faced in the future, that I would be right by their side going through it with them. 

This line in the movie reminds me of that verse in the bible:

Love is patient, love is kind. 

It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking,

it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrong.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

1 Corinthians 3:4-6

I can only hope when i encounter such a special thing like love,
that i will try to uphold all the characteristics that love possesses. 


My future hubby will be the unluckiest guy to set eyes on me, cause i will never let him out of my sight(poor guy). He will be mine forever and online mine >:] Patience holds a strong place in my heart cause my personality will test a lot of it.

..my paranoia

..my insecurities 

..my indecisiveness

..my random midnight cravings

..my hypocrisy 

..my emotional instability

My hearts been dropped a lot of times, 
i'm sorry its a little tattered.
do you think you can put it back together?

We forget the rarity that love possesses sometimes.
The feeling of giving someone you're heart and soul and everything you have in yourself.
Scary thing ain't it ? I hope one day i will be able to do that.. (:


Dear John

WAHH, love love love. It's that special moment that you share together 
that you can't even comprehend into words the feeling of being with that person 
gives you and being so close within their arms. It makes you feel that anything you
 set your mind to is possible, that nothing else matters but that moment you were in. 
It's like that feeling you get when you just slow dance in the middle of nowhere, 
playing music from the soundtrack of your favourite movie of all time that makes you just those tingling sensation of butterflies and that you wouldn't ever want that moment to end.


Letters to Juliet

BLERGH.
the things you never want to live with in life, regret.
i can't say anything better than the quote that you just read.
just, carpe diem.


I like you, BABE.

My idea of the perfect relationship ..


.. taking you home even if it meant you had to be physically dragged
.. taking 2 jackets to places cause you knew i'd be too stubborn to take yours
.. going into woolies to see what we would buy and compare
.. slow dancing even when there was no music
.. lying down on the grass watching the starry night sky
.. cuddles that you wouldn't ever want to let go of
.. motivating the other when there's something due the next day
.. willing to do anything for your happiness
.. making plans to go to ikea to pick out future furniture
.. taking care of you even if it meant their health was at stake
.. being comfy enough to know you can be the DJ when you're in the car
.. not being embarrassed cause we're just as weird as each other
.. already thinking of future baby names even if it was to do with constellations
.. respecting each others boundaries
.. plan road trips of spending the day together
.. being able to cook for them and seeing how appreciative they are

man, once i find a guy that that can do half of these things

i might just have to keep him forever :D

future hubby, be patient with me

and i hope it'll be worth the wait.

BUT when you do, it'll be AMAZING.


Leap of faith.
enough said.

LEGIT,

 things just got real xD

p.s i know i know, too much romantic movies.
what can i say? sucker for rom-coms.

katwinky.x.